Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Thoughts of the Student Athlete Academic Center Drop-in Writing Tutor

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I wait. The door (propped open to invite
the passing athletes to come in and sit
with me)—symbolic, meaning "I can't write"—
is why, each day, alone, I read. Permit
me now to dissipate this myth that they
are fearless, though they play with courage on
the field; or court; or track; for all obey
dear Pride's controlling voice. Not speed nor brawn
can separate them now from others who,
at college, struggle to complete their work. 
With knowing eyes, I watch them ponder: "Do,
today, this opportunity, I shirk?"
I bite my tongue; these thoughts don't leave my slate.
The door, still open to invite. I wait.


  

19 comments:

  1. This is very interesting. I feel like a lot of us can relate to this in one way or another (even if we are the ones that the tutor is waiting on).

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  2. What a great use of enjambment, this reads not in lines but as a whole connected thought. Very good!

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  3. The writing in this is incredible! It was such a fun read. I really loved this. The enjambment was awesome, as Gaylie pointed out, and the whole topic makes me laugh a lot.

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  4. Thanks for the feedback. Do you guys think I went overboard on my use of anastrophe?

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  5. I really liked this! I think the topic you picked made this sonnet particularly engaging. It's funny and quirky, but still well written.

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  6. What about it made it engaging? I didn't really take advantage of metaphors like I probably should have.

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  7. This is so interesting! I really love your use of enjambment- it kept my attention focused throughout the entire sonnet. So quirky- I love it!

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  8. Quirky: that seems to be the word of choice haha. But thanks for commenting.

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  9. One final question, did my use of punctuation make sense? At the beginning it's pretty punctuation heavy.

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  10. I didn't realize sharing this to Google+ would generate so many views! It's fun to see how quickly the internet can spread your ideas.

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  11. Why did you choose to capitalize Pride?

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    Replies
    1. I was trying to personify the concept, similar to how Shakespeare personifies Love and Time in Sonnet 116.

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  12. I really loved your sonnet! Was this for a class?

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    1. Yeah, it's for Shakespeare 382 at BYU. Gideon Burton is the professor. It's a really interesting class because there is a huge emphasis on social learning. I'm curious, how did you find my post?

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  13. One final comment-"dissipate" was a great word choice!

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  14. A friend saw it on Google plus and recommended it to me.

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    Replies
    1. Awesome! I'm glad to see the learning approach is working. I'll be sure to let my professor know- he'll be thrilled!

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  15. Feel free to share it with your friends.

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