The first of kisses: guarded, but long-sought.
It's clear desire--the spark is in his eye.
Secluded in a basement, dark and fraught
With tension thick between a girl and guy.
He grabs my face with force; he does not ask
If I am ready. No, he pushes hard.
First lips, then teeth, then tongue--he has a task.
The last naivete I have is marred.
He pulls away and grins with boyish pride;
Upstairs he runs, then drives into the night.
Alone, I blush, then face my mom inside
Where she reveals the truth with great delight.
Oh how I rued the days that we had dated
When mom explained that we two were related!
Wow, that was definitely a twist that I did not see coming! Your sonnet manages to be upsetting, morbid, and kind of funny all at the same time.
ReplyDeleteI didn't realize that you had included naivete. That's quite the word to fit into a sonnet, but it actually fits. Love the stresses on lips, teeth, tongue. Great volta, especially with the feminine endings. Wonderful work.
ReplyDeleteI really like the morbid suburban pastoral mixed with the oral imagery. It makes you really reconsider things like family and dating relationships, which I think is what a good volta is supposed to do.
ReplyDeleteYour use of enjambment is on a different playing field from most of ours. WOW. I am very impressed.
ReplyDeleteWOOOOOOOOOOOOW, my roommate said this was literally one of the best modern sonnets she has ever heard, personally I really feel bad if this is true. Its a well done sonnet but it made me cringe and then laugh, so I hope that's what you were going for!
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